Good Ol' Mom and Dad

Parents are special people. There is no other way to put it. They take care of you, they take you places (until you can drive and then they let you have the car), they embarrass you, they make you mad, they give you advice, and, most importantly, they love you no matter what you do.

My parents are special people. They are very special. And interesting. Lets just say I have got some stories. Anyways, I know they love me no matter what I say or do so I try to do the same back to them. When they embarrass me I try to let it go because it is actually almost funny. So, I deal with the embarrassment and all the other little annoying things that they do to me. Because of this, for the most part, my parents and I get along and we don't fight. I actually hate fighting with people in general and I especially hate fighting with my parents. Thats why I let so much go, its just not worth the fight. We aren't perfect though, we do fight and one of the few times is when either my mom or dad or both don't agree with a choice that I make.

I have a really hard time making decisions and choosing stuff so when I finally decide on something I am really happy. Yesterday, I finally made a decision about college (I am going to stay at home for the fall and got to college at home and then go to Binghamton in the spring unless I get taken off the waiting list for the fall) so I called my Dad to tell him what I wanted to do. I thought that he would be happy for me but all that happened was he started yelling to talk to my Mom.

That was not exactly the reaction that I was expecting from him, so I got mad at him and started yelling that he is not the one going to college, I am, and it is my decision because it is my life and not his. So then he started yelling back at me and then I gave the phone to my Mom and he started yelling at her that she pushed me in the wrong direction and that she should have been pushing me to go to Buffalo in the fall and not stay at home. When I heard that I got even more mad because all along my Dad has been saying he doesn't care where I go or what I do as long as I am happy but I guess all along he has been lying because he obviously does care.

I don't think I have ever been so mad at my Dad before. When he got home last night I did not say one word to him. I only spoke to him to ask if he was ready to apologize to me yet. He said no and that he was not going to apologive because he had nothing to apologize for. So then that was that.

My Dad will come around eventually and when he does, I will be waiting for him with open arms. Like I said, parents are special, and in my case stubborn, so I guess they should be handled with care.

Does Anyone Know How To Make A Decision???

Decision making has never been my thing. I am always the last to order at a restaurant, I always buy at least four different flavors of gum, and I spend the whole night picking out a movie because I can never decide what I want. Its even worse when I need to make a decision for other people because then I not only feel the pressure from myself to choose what is right, I have to deal with making sure I choose something right for them too. It’s so annoying because it wastes my time but no matter what, I can never make a decision.

The other problem is I always ask people what I should do because I can never decide for myself. I rely so much on other people's opinions and it always influences my final decision. My parents definitely do not help me either because when I ask them, they give me half an answer (if that is possible). They try not to tell me what to do, so that I will “make my own choices,” and then at the same time they manage to tell me exactly what they think I should do. They truly have a talent. All they end up doing is making the whole situation worse because they both have two completely different opinions (which has me try and make them both happy, which never happens).

My lack of decision making capabilities is having me choose a college be like 20 times harder. Sometimes I feel like I have a million choices and then sometimes I feel like I have one. I think people with a lack of decision making skills also have the tendency to make things into extremes.

I am so frustrated with college I am almost ready to make a poll and ask people what they think I should do. You know what, here it is: Choice A is that I go to Buffalo; Choice B is that I go to Buffalo and transfer to Binghamton in the spring; Choice C is that I go to college at home for the fall and transfer to Binghamton in the Spring; Choice D (only possible if I get off the wait list and in to Binghamton for the fall) I go to Binghamton; or Choice E (my personal favorite at the moment) I skip college and join the circus.

I wish someone would just tell me what to do but I guess it’s just a part of the "college picking experience". It really would not be the same if someone just said to me, "do this, it’s the right choice." As annoying and stressful as deciding is, I bet I would be even more annoyed if someone decided for me. I am probably better off this way; maybe I will even learn how to make a decision.

College Applications: The Procrastination Game

I have been looking forward to College for as long as I could remember. I loved the idea of being on my own, far away from my parents and their rules. It all seemed so far away and then before I knew it it was time for me to start looking at Colleges. Throughout my junior year I looked at Binghamton, Buffalo, University of Delaware, and University of Maryland: College Park.

When Junior year ended I was so relaxed because I figured no more work until September. Thats probably why I was surprised when in August alot of my friends all said that they started their applications. I have always been a procrastinator so to me, August was way to early to start. Everyone kept warning me that the applications took forever but i just kept pushing them aside. I knew I would get everything done so I was not worried.

The rest of the summer flew by and then school started. Everyone was talking about where they were applying and where they wanted to go. College was the center of every conversation but I was still unsure of where I wanted to apply. In the end of September, my best friend handed in all of her applications and finished all of her essays. I finally decided that maybe it was time to start.

I started with the "easy" stuff. I did all of the forms and filled out all of the blue sheets for the guidance apartment in my school. I hit my teachers up for recommendations and I made my resume. I finished all of my stuff within a month but one thing: the dreaded essay.

I thought my college essay was going to be the easiest thing to write. It had no specifications and I could basically write whatever I wanted, but no matter what I did, I could not write it. I tried writing it from all different "angles". After all of my attempts, all I did was sound desperate. Finally, after alot of thinking, I realized I could just write about myself. I ended up writing about a story about myself from when I was younger. The story was funny but serious at the same time and it related to alot of things in my life. I ended up writing, in my opinion, a really interesting essay.

Looking back I definitely should have started my applications earlier. I would have saved myself alot of stress from having to cram everything in all at once. As for my essay, I regret that I spent so much time thinking about how I was going to write my essay, I ended up just overthinking everything and wasting time. I could have written that same essay in a quarter of the time that it took me too if I had just relaxed and stopped worrying about what the colleges wanted.